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Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
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Bront
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Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
on:
May 13, 2008, 06:37:30 PM »
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HOLYHEAD, Wales (AP) -- A man who dressed up as Darth Vader, wearing a black garbage bag for a cape, and assaulted the founders of Britain's first Jedi church was given a suspended sentence Tuesday.
Arwel Wynne Hughes, 27, attacked Jedi church founder Barney Jones -- a.k.a. Master Jonba Hehol -- with a metal crutch, hitting him on the head, prosecutors told Holyhead Magistrates' Court.
He also whacked Jones' 18-year-old cousin, Michael Jones -- or Master Mormi Hehol -- bruising his thigh, in the March 25 incident.
Unfortunately for Hughes, the incident was recorded on a video camera that the cousins had set up to film themselves in a light saber battle.
"Darth Vader! Jedis!" Hughes shouted as he approached.
Hughes claimed he couldn't remember the incident, having drunk the best part of a 10-liter (two-and-half-gallon) box of wine beforehand.
"He knows his behavior was wrong and didn't want it to happen but he has no recollection of it," said Hughes' lawyer, Frances Jones.
District Judge Andrew Shaw sentenced Hughes to two months in jail but suspended the sentence for one year.
He also ordered Hughes to pay £100 ($195) to each of his victims and £60 ($117) in court costs.
Barney Jones, his brother Daniel and cousin Michael set up the Church of Jediism, Anglesey order, last year. It claims about 30 members.
Jedi is the faith followed by some of the central characters in the "Star Wars" films. In the 2001 United Kingdom census, 390,000 people -- 0.7 percent of the population -- listed Jedi as their religion.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #1 on:
May 13, 2008, 08:08:36 PM »
Wowzer. Maybe they should call themselves pattowans (sp?), not masters...getting beat up by a drunk darth vader.
Ok, so you have the guys that follow hubbard, and the guys who follow lucas. Any predictions as to who is next? Maybe Herbert?
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #2 on:
May 13, 2008, 10:28:56 PM »
Drink 2.5 gallons of wine from a box and see how well YOU function!
You missed the Heinlein followers from Stranger in a Strange Land.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
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Reply #3 on:
May 14, 2008, 09:23:45 AM »
Quote from: Bront on May 13, 2008, 10:28:56 PM
Drink 2.5 gallons of wine from a box and see how well YOU function!
Sounds like fun, but first I'll hide all the cameras and Metal Crutches. Then the big question is Am I Darth Crispen, or Master Crispen...
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Lathlander
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #4 on:
May 14, 2008, 10:31:24 AM »
I want to join that church! Who's with me?
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #5 on:
May 14, 2008, 11:34:25 AM »
I think you would have to found it. then you would actually haev to go to church, Lath. Seeing as you are one of the founding members and all.
Just for curiousity's sake, what would your tenants be? Cause if you came up Red in your magic test, perhaps you should start the Sith Church.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #6 on:
May 14, 2008, 02:12:33 PM »
I'm OK with founding my very own Jedi Temple. This means all of the faithful get to carry around a lightsaber in public.
I know that I scored as red for magic but that doesn't mean I'm a sith at heart. So, the tenants of the faith will be as Master Yoda taught us.
There is no emotion, there is peace.
There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.
There is no passion, there is serenity.
There is no death, there is the Force.
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Yoda - Do or do not, there is no try
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
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Reply #7 on:
May 14, 2008, 02:16:41 PM »
Have fun in church with all of the other robots. No emotion, no passion? I would have never made a good jedi. I would have been one of those adepts taht was off the radar.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #8 on:
May 14, 2008, 02:22:42 PM »
The other option, which I personally like better is this one from Grand Master Skywalker.
Jedi are the guardians of peace in the galaxy.
Jedi use their powers to defend and to protect.
Jedi respect all life, in any form.
Jedi serve others rather than ruling over them, for the good of the galaxy.
Jedi seek to improve themselves through knowledge and training.
The other can be considered the orthodox version of the faith.
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Yoda - Do or do not, there is no try
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
Fire fixes everything!
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #9 on:
May 14, 2008, 02:37:45 PM »
Orthodox=fail. Too many rules, and you have to be an automoton.
Um, Lathlander, you
DO
know that jedis, the force, and all things lucas are made up stories, right?
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #10 on:
May 14, 2008, 02:47:24 PM »
Yep, I know it's all pretend. That doesn't mean I can't make people think it's not.
I'll put you on he Jedi council of you want.
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Yoda - Do or do not, there is no try
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
Fire fixes everything!
There are some who call me...Tim.
Drewcifer
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #11 on:
May 14, 2008, 03:43:31 PM »
That is not without it's lure. Let me speak with my Freemason brothers and see if it is ok for me to split my focus.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #12 on:
May 14, 2008, 05:15:50 PM »
Very well, I shall await your answer my jedi brother.
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Yoda - Do or do not, there is no try
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
Fire fixes everything!
There are some who call me...Tim.
Bront
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #13 on:
May 14, 2008, 06:09:20 PM »
Sorry, I'm Southern Forcist Jedi, I won't have none o yer western orthodox bullcrap Lath!
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #14 on:
May 14, 2008, 10:14:07 PM »
This is awesome! I haven't laughed this hard in a while. Yeah Lath, I have to agree with Drew there, Red definately is as close to the polar opposide to the Jedi philosophy as you can get. But, perhaps I may suggest an alternative. The inherent philosophies of red and black are pretty much the bread and butter of the church that I have founded. Its tenents are pretty simple and its membership is low. Disciples are sent out in pairs, a master and an apprentice. Anger, hate, fear, aggression, suffering, these are the way. Join me, and together we could rule the world as master and apprentice! Join the First Church of the Sith!
Quote from: Drewcifer on May 13, 2008, 08:08:36 PM
pattowans (sp
Um, for those of you who are not in the know of the Star Wars lingo, its padawan, which delineates a Jedi from being a trained Jedi Knight, or a learner, an apprentice.
Quote from: Bront on May 13, 2008, 10:28:56 PM
Drink 2.5 gallons of wine from a box and see how well YOU function!
10 liters!!
OMG!! I couldn't drink 10 liters of anything.
Quote from: Lathlander on May 14, 2008, 02:22:42 PM
The other can be considered the orthodox version of the faith.
The unorthodox branch allows the Masters to be married, while the orthodox sect doesn't, and as a result, about half of the Masters of the orthodox branch are gay and molest the young padawan learners while they are in training. No wonder the Jedi fell.
(Join the Sith)
Quote from: Drewcifer on May 14, 2008, 02:37:45 PM
Orthodox=fail. Too many rules, and you have to be an automoton.
Um, Lathlander, you
DO
know that jedis, the force, and all things lucas are made up stories, right?
Oh good God!
Quote from: Bront on May 14, 2008, 06:09:20 PM
Sorry, I'm Southern Forcist Jedi, I won't have none o yer western orthodox bullcrap Lath!
Nice!
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #15 on:
May 17, 2008, 11:09:59 AM »
So all I have to do is spread fear and anarchy, then rule with an iron fist? I can do that T, where do I sign up?
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Yoda - Do or do not, there is no try
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons. For thou art crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
Fire fixes everything!
There are some who call me...Tim.
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #16 on:
May 21, 2008, 02:18:53 AM »
Gee, if only I knew how to do a linkie..
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"It takes a rare kind of wisdom to accept change and redemtion in another. Many would refuse, seeing only what was, not what is."
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Bront
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #17 on:
May 21, 2008, 06:13:44 PM »
Quote from: raistlin on May 21, 2008, 02:18:53 AM
Gee, if only I knew how to do a linkie..
Um, hasn't this been explained to you before?
{url=<website>}<text>{/url}
Replace {} with [], and <website> and <text> with the website address and text you want displayed.
Or just post a URL, and the forum will convert it into a link automaticly.
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My D20 Setting
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Re: Drunk 'Darth Vader' assaults 'Jedi leaders'
«
Reply #18 on:
May 23, 2008, 12:07:46 AM »
Aint technology great? Now, if I only had a website...
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"It takes a rare kind of wisdom to accept change and redemtion in another. Many would refuse, seeing only what was, not what is."
-G'Kar
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